Daily Archives: May 8, 2005

Deep Thoughts on Mother’s Day


Isn’t it the greatest when you realize your Mom is an even more cool lady then you ever thought possible? Today being Mother’s Day, it got me thinking about my own Mom and how she’s been such a big part of my life and gave me the strength to be who I am today.

The hard part of coming “out” as a Domme to some friends and family is trying to figure out how they will “take it”. In some ways, I figured I could handle or ignore any of my family finding out, but I wasn’t too sure how my Mom would handle it. She is definitely from another generation and was largely raised by nuns in a boarding school and so had a fairly narrow upbringing, fell in love with my Dad and was married at age 18. She will be celebrating her 65th birthday next month.

My father passed away very suddenly last year in late February after having survived several heart attacks, having a pacemaker installed and two types of cancer. I travelled back to the Maritimes (Eastern Canada) for the funeral and ended up staying a good part of the year helping my Mom, keeping her company and helping her get her life back together. In many ways, it was a time of discovery for myself as well, as it allowed me to take a “step back” from my own life and gain some perspective on a lot of things that were overwhelming me. It also allowed me to spend the most time I’ve ever had with my Mom since I graduated high school and went out on my own… We ended up bonding even more, if that is possible.

So, here it was back in January that my Mom comes to stay with us here in Montreal for a week to get a change of scenery and take it easy. Now I have a huge “write-on/wipe-off” calendar covering the freezer door of my fridge, so as to keep track of various events, activities, meetings, holidays and such. I forgot that my Mom was there and hadn’t changed any of the names… so here she comes to me and asks “What’s Fetish Friday?”

Hmmmmmmmm

Wow.

Oh boy, where do I even start?

A couple months back, I *had* mentioned a growing interest to her in some aspects of the leather fashion scene here in Montreal, as my parents are native and were quite well known for their custom-made native-style leather clothing, as far back as the 70’s. So *that* she understood… She had even heard the word “fetish” because it is also associated with tiny native/aboriginal figurines. She also knew of my interest in theatrical makeup and scifi/fantasy costuming through the years. (Heck, she even helped me with some of my award-winning costumes!)

So I managed to tie these aspects all together to explain the lighter aspects of the fetish club scene, leaving out the heavier kink aspects. She definitely understood the people-watching/voyeristic aspects of it, as Montreal is definitely a great place to people-watch all year ’round. (If you’ve ever seen all the cafés on St. Denis street, you know what I mean…)

I managed to explain the basics of dominant/submissive relationships and she easily grasped that concept, as my parents had often been considered gurus/leaders/guides by *many* other people throughout their lives and helped to guide them to a better way of life by understanding themselves better.

In particular, my Mom reminded me of a young native man who ended up living with our family for over a year when I was around 6; as he had a strong need to be guided and naturally gravitated to my parents. He helped out in our family’s store as well as around the house and such, almost like a family member. After some consideration, my Mom realizes that he must have had some sub tendencies to their dominant personalities, without the kink involved — therefore she know understood what I was talking about. Mom and I stayed up to the wee hours of the morning, discussing the many other forms of D/s relationships we’ve seen through the years. It was quite an enjoyable and refreshing eye-opener for both of us…

The week before, I had splurged and ordered myself a gorgeous black lambskin corset as a late Christmas present for myself, to wear to the January Fetish Friday event and it finally arrived the day before. So, to end things off, it was my own Mom who laced me into my first leather corset! And of course I couldn’t resist telling her “tighter, Mommy, tighter!” (à la Scarlett O’Hara-style), while we both giggled ourselves silly before she sent me off for my evening of fun…

Wow, now isn’t that the coolest Mom?

** Mom, you are and have been the best and strongest woman in my life. And through the years, you’ve taught me to be strong within myself no matter what life throws at you, and that has undoubtedly been the best lesson I’ve ever learnt. **