Category Archives: Family & Friends

family, mother, father, brother, sister, extended family, relationship, kinship, blood family, friend, friends, friendship, happiness, closeness, ties, supportive, support-network

A Weekend of Family Time & Kinky Time

An interesting weekend filled with both family obligations, and some kinky social time…

My partner Oudjat and I had the weekend to ourselves for a change, and spent the first part of it just chilling out, cuddling and taking it easy. Extremely relaxing!

On Saturday evening, we had a family obligation for a Birthday dinner, with a lovely home-cooked meal and topped it off with a magnificent 5 Layer Chocolate Mocha cake that Oudjat picked out at my favourite local Moroccan pastry shop in his neighbourhood.


After a quick turn-around to my place to freshen up, and pick up our kinky “toy bag” of goodies; we headed downtown to Club L’Espace, our favourite dungeon and kinky social zone. It was a delight to meet up with an old friend, my former submissive “g”, as we hadn’t seen in each other since last December and it was very enjoyable time chatting and catching up with each other.

We stayed at Club L’Espace until closing (after 4am) and headed back home as the morning sun was rising and the sleepy city was slowly coming back awake. I really love that quiet interlude between when the night’s noisy party-makers have already headed home, and Montreal’s early morning workers have yet to make an appearance. It’s a great time to take a nice walk in one of the many parks, or even a slow drive home through the almost-deserted city streets is that much more enjoyable.

I really love my city and it’s many facets!

The Training of a Young FemDomme

This past week, I have begun the training of a new young FemDomme, Lady Ruby Dragon. She has been close to my family for years and I’ve considered her part of my Leather family, even if she was not a blood relative.

She has recently turned 18 and is now legally an adult and can finally indulge in her BDSM and fetish interests.

Tonight will mark the beginning of her introduction into the local kink community; as we will be bringing her with us to her first playparty at our favourite Montreal area dungeon, Club L’Espace.

More news to come…

Death in the Family

Yesterday, I received news that the only other woman I called “Mom” (besides my own Mother) had passed away suddenly the day before.


It was a terrible shock, as I had been tracking her recent illness and progress via my friend’s FB statuses and text messages. They had done emergency surgery and installed a pacemaker and everything seem to be on the upswing; but she passed away peacefully the following day.

It’s been very difficult to accept, and in my grief I have not felt up to blogging very much; so you’ll have to forgive me if I go silent for a while…

A transition from friend to servant


Last summer, I ran into one of my old friends at one of the local Fetish Balls. It was quite a pleasant surprise, since we hadn’t seen each other for about 8 or 9 years!

We had originally met through an organization that I headed back in the early to mid-90s. At the time, this person became a valuable asset both to me and the organization because of their eagerness and willingness to help out in a volunteer capacity.

Fast forward to this winter and all the various difficulties and obstacles that I have been encountering in my personal and private life; I found myself needing to go out and be with my kink friends on a regular basis in order to keep some level of sanity.

My old friend had already a passing familiarity with the local scene, but had not been active in it for quite some time and was interested in getting back into it. I offered my friend the opportunity to accompany me to several local BDSM & fetish events and he gladly took me up on it. Although rather nervous at first, he did quite a fine job of serving myself and my best friend, Lady Katana, at a several outings to the Loft Le Chateau. He has continued to do so on a regular basis and has fit in quite well with my circle of kink friends.

It’s been a rather strange transition for me — to overcome the feelings I have for seeing one of my previously vanilla *friends* serving me. In some ways, it didn’t seem quite right. However, over the past while, I have managed to come to terms with it on a personal level. I looked back and remembered how much this friend of mine would be so eager to help me and the organization I headed. I started to really make the connection of how deep the need to serve was built into his psyche and that it had manifested itself even way back then.

Both of us were very different people back then, and our relationship was in a much more vanilla (if still somewhat unorthodox) setting. However, I was able to look deeper and realize that much of the same dynamic D/s was there, just couched in a different setting. I was a leader, he was one of my most fervent volunteers. I consider myself a FemDomme now, and I find that my friend is now of my most devoted servants. It’s the same — but different.

We’ve managed to spend more together as of late, and he has assisted me in helping to lift many loads from my shoulders, by taking on many smaller tasks that had been stressing me and that was taking time away from higher priority things in my life. I find it has really helped me in so many ways… So it is with great pleasure that I have decided to accept him as my personal submissive, servant and most importantly, as my personal assistant.

I have named him “tomo”, which is a Japanese term — it is most commonly translated as “friend” or “companion“, but it also has a dual meaning of “follower” or “attendant“. It seems so perfect and we are both delighted with the choice.

Thanksgiving weekend and munch time with old friends

kinky thanksgiving

On Saturday, I dropped by the Saturday Lunch Munch out in Lasalle. This munch is organized by Lady Renata & Laird Dave and has been running for 10 years now!

It was a fairly quiet one, but it was nice to catch up with old friends for a change. I’ve been stuck in the house for several weeks now, trying to let my back injury recuperate as much as possible; so as a result I tend to go a bit stir-crazy at times, missing all my kink friends.

The rest of my Thanksgiving long weekend was rather quiet, but I’m gearing myself up for next weekend, as I’ll be spending it with several of my vanilla friends at a local annual event — should be fun!

When pain is not a good thing…


For those of you who may be wondering why my blog has been so silent the past while…

It was Saturday November 10th, only two days after my birthday and I had not even had a chance to really celebrate it with any of my friends. I was on the phone with my best friend Lady Katana and started to feel a pain in my upper abdomen and I couldn’t even finish my phone call with her.

Originally I thought the pain was my gallstones acting up; but after an hour of shooting pain I realized that this was a very serious gallstone attack and asked my housemate Lord Michael to drive me to the local hospital. Now you must realize that I really despise hospitals and for me to ask to be brought to one means that things are seriously wrong… Despite the lineup at the emergency, when the triage nurse saw the severe pain I was in, they ushered me in quickly to begin processing and diagnosis.

Problems began when they wanted to insert an IV; you see all my life I have had a hypersensitivity to most pain; but most particularly those involving piercing my skin, such as with any needles — be they a blood drop test, an injection, or worst of all, an IV. I have particularly tiny veins and they are hard to “tap” and so even the most skillful of blood technicians end up trying to pierce me a half dozen times or more trying to simply find a vein. When they do find one, they invariably end up having to “wiggle” around trying to get it in, and all while I am in absolute agony, trying my darnest not to move or to swear like a sailor. Unfortunately, the vein often collapses, causing them to start the process all over again, and leaving me with extensive subcutaneous bruising.

IV insertions

Now, combine that torture with the existing extreme pain in my abdomen and I was starting to sound like someone with Tourette’s Syndrome, as I tearfully tried to find some way to deal with the ordeal of multiple painful IV punctures by several different nurses and technicians, none of which could successfully find a workable vein.

Finally, one of them smartened up and gave me some sort of sub-lingual painkiller, but it did take a good 30-45 minutes to begin to have an effect, but combined with the exhaustion caused by the pain, I eventually lost conciousness.

The next memory I had was waking up in a strangely familiar room, but from a unusual perspective. It was then that I realized that I was in an intensive care unit room (ICU).

(I should explain that almost 2 years ago Lord Michael’s father was very ill for several months before he passed away in the hospital. I had come to visit him several times while he was in the ICU of that very same hospital. The sight was so familiar and yet strange because my viewpoint was from the hospital bed this time, not sitting beside it. )

Even though I was rather dazed by the painkillers, I was truly surprised to find myself in the ICU rather than a regular hospital bed, because I didn’t think that things were that bad; however it seemed that I had acute pancreatis caused by my gallstones; and apparently “about 20% of acute pancreatitis cases are severe with a mortality of about 20%”.

I distinctly remember seeing several things upon my return to conciousness that truly made me happy. The first was to wake up and see Michael entering my ICU room carrying an armful of my pillows from home — he remembered how I sleep so much better when I am in pain when I am supported properly with my favourite pillows, and had gone through all the trouble to drag them all the way to the hospital. What an absolute sweetie for thinking to make me more comfortable!

The second was to see that my faithful submissive toriko had already been quietly sitting at my bedside, anxiously waiting for me to wake up. I remember that his face was so clouded with worry, but lit up when he realized that I was finally awake and spoke his name and held out my hand for him to approach.


I had some rather strange episodes while I was in intensive care, but I shall continue those in a later post… it is still a bit difficult to relive some of those memories and I find myself rather weary at the moment, as I still get tired out quite easily these days.

Another quiet Christmas

My houseboy toriko has still been looking for a new job once the older offer turned out to not be what they had promoted it to be. As a result, he has been getting a bit frustrated with his job search during the holidays, as very few companies are hiring at this time. I cautioned him not to worry, as the job market would pick up once again as the new year started afresh.

So, my gift from my submissive toriko was for him to stay with us and attend to my every need for two weeks during the end of December and beginning of January. He had already been spending so much time here taking care of me since my return home out of the hospital, that it only seemed natural to extend his stay to include the holidays. As usual, he slept on his mat on the floor at the foot of my bed, so that he could be nearby should I need anything in the middle of the night.

Christmas shopping

I didn’t have much shopping to do for the holidays; however I did make two shopping expeditions; the first to Carrefour Laval with toriko and my painslut JF and the second to Fairview Pointe Claire with toriko and our sweet playmate Roxy. Because of the holiday crowds, I made use of my three-wheeled electric scooter, in order to save my energy and not overtax myself. It was nice to get out with friends, but was still rather tiring because of all the chaos and noise. I was quite happy to pick up some nice geeky toys to spoil the big “boys” in my life…

For my house-mate Lord Michael, I choose a very cool set of remote-controlled “Air Havoc” helicopters; they are small and light enough to fly indoors and can battle each other with small lasers! These should be lots of fun to experiment with in the months to come…


For my submissive toriko, I tracked down an extremely lightweight Bluetooth headset to go with his high-end cellphone; they are quite sleek and it doesn’t hurt that they are also in my favourite colours of red and black. They allow him to listen to his mp3 library on his phone and go seamlessly to any incoming phone call. He just adored them!

Motorola ROKR headphones

I received some money again as gifts from various family and friends, so I picked myself up a few things that I had been eyeing recently; among them was some new aircraft aluminum bondage suspension rings, two large “panic snaps” and about two hundred feet of black and red rope including 50 feet of new “flat rope”.

suspension ring

I am looking forward to the opportunity of putting my newly expanded shibari and suspension rope bondage kit to good use in the new year!