Tag Archives: Sexuality

Feast on this!!

Our Canadian Thanksgiving happened a few weeks ago, and next week will be American Thanksgiving — what better time to feast on this yummy video of Katy Perry wearing latex and surrounded by food? Enjoy!!

Sociologists Attempt to Reclassify BDSM as Leisure Activity to Remove Stigma

In a bid to remove the stigma surrounding BDSM sexual practice, sociologists are attempting to reclassify it as a “leisure activity”. Although scholars do not always agree on a precise definition of leisure, there is a consensus that leisure experience must be intrinsically motivated, freely chosen, and thus personally meaningful.

There is an incredibly wide range of potential activities, both personal and social, that if freely chosen and intrinsically motivated, can qualify as legitimate leisure, including all sorts of hobbies, artistic endeavors, cultural events, sports, outdoor activities, and social activities. The possibilities for leisure are seemingly endless.

The researchers, led by Idaho State University, wanted to build on recent studies that suggested instead of a traditional psychopathologic explanation, BDSM could be understood as a potential leisure activity.

Since this framing of attitudes had not been scientifically or empirically explored yet, the researchers decided this was just what they would set out to do.

Historically, BDSM has long been understood from a psychopathological perspective,” lead author Dr. DJ Williams wrote in a previous study published in the Journal of Positive Sexuality. But as this research showed that many people don’t consider BDSM as a sexual interaction, rather as a means of forming intimate relationships, among other things, this was considered a limited approach.

In considering the many academic and non-academic accounts of BDSM, our focus is to suggest that a broad leisure perspective currently offers the best theoretical approach to begin making sense of BDSM,” he wrote.

In the new study, published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, Dr Williams and colleagues surveyed 935 BDSM participants who answered questions about BDSM experiences according to the attributes considered important for leisure activities.

The researchers suggest the results show that BDSM could easily be reclassified as a leisure activity due to the similarities between both like developing personal skills, creating a sense of adventure, and reducing stress. If it isn’t similar to leisure pursuits, why does it include words such as “play” and “games”, they posited.

Of the participants, whose ages ranged from 18 to 78, 90 percent said that BDSM gave them a sense of personal freedom, 99 percent said it gave them pleasure and enjoyment, 90 percent said they used personal skills, 90 percent said it was associated with self-expression, 91 percent said it reduced stress, and 97 percent said it involved positive emotions.

Our findings show, overwhelmingly, that BDSM fits properties of common leisure experience, similar to people who enjoy golf, swimming and attending cultural events,” Dr Williams said.

The researchers suggested that reclassification was important because if BDSM was understood and recognized as a “legitimate leisure experience with important personal benefits, similar to engaging in skiing, hiking, photography, or painting,” it could remove the stigma associated with so-called sexual deviance.

Source: Applying Leisure 101 to Simplify & Complicate BDSM

“Deliciously Disabled” Sex-Positive Party during the Parapan Am Games

Deliciously_Disabled_poster

A sex party is planned for disabled individuals in Toronto on August 14th, during the Parapan Am Games which has drawn more than 1,000 athletes with disabilities to the region. But don’t call it an orgy…

“An orgy is when everybody comes together and has sex together,” explained one of the event’s organizers. “This is a sex-positive play party. The difference is that people can attend the event but they don’t have to participate if they don’t want to — they can be voyeurs, they can enjoy it like you would enjoy any other type of party … but then there’s the added bonus of being able to be intimate with your partner or explore some sexual activity if you want to.”

Deliciously Disabled event organizers, Stella Palikarova (left), and Andrew Morrison-Gurza

Event organizers, Stella Palikarova (left), and Andrew Morrison-Gurza

The event’s organizers say that while most discussions about accessibility for the disabled focus on physical barriers, it’s also important to look at the emotional and social hurdles that people with disabilities face, such as the widespread belief that they aren’t sexual beings.

“Access (to sexuality) is such a major barrier for people with disabilities — I don’t think there’s any other group in society that, depending on the level of their physical limitation, can’t even pleasure themselves sexually,” said Stella Palikarova, a disability awareness consultant.

“You can imagine trying to go through life being completely unable to have any sort of sexual relief or even to think that you are perceived by others as being sexually desirable or a sexual person,” said Palikarova, who uses a wheelchair. “That becomes a really major human rights issue for me.”

As buzz around the event grows, a spokeswoman with the Council of Canadians With Disabilities said the issue the party seeks to highlight is an important one.

“The reality is that we are sexual beings,” said vice-chairwoman Pat Danforth. “It’s an issue that remains seldom talked about, which I find quite bizarre.” Danforth, who herself uses a wheelchair, said she’s met a number of individuals with significant disabilities who’ve told her “no one ever gave them permission before to be sexual.”

“With this event, one of the things it will do is, it will give people permission to have an opportunity to explore their own sexuality,” she said. “If it’s in such a way that it’s demonstrating a healthy take on sexuality, then that’s a good thing. It makes people aware and it makes some people less uncomfortable.”

Event Details: The location is at Buddies in Bad Times theatre (which is fully accessible). and it can hold 125 people including roughly 25 wheelchairs. Tickets are $20 each. Personal support workers can attend for free, and there will be interpreters for the hearing impaired.

Tickets: Deliciously Disabled Party

Related article: Toronto club hosting accessible sex party for disabled people

Sex History Calculator

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Slate features a sex history calculator. Input your age, gender (male or female) and number of sex partners since 18 and compare results with other participants.

Can you remember everyone?

Do you even WANT to remember everyone? 😉

Here’s the online calculator so that you can try it yourself:
Sex History Calculator

PS: Apparently I’ve done the deed more than 86% of my female peers. However, I should state that I’ve never been one to choose sexual partners lightly, and I don’t regret even a single one. I guess my age group tended to not be too sexually adventurous or something…

Remember Your Deceased Spouse With A Memorial Dildo

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Sex toys come in all shapes and sizes. But Netherlands-based designer Mark Sturkenboom is bringing his sex toy to a whole new level of weird. The device, called 21 Grams, is “a memory box that allows a widow to go back to the intimate memories of a lost beloved one,” according to Sturkenboom’s website.

He’s created a special ‘memory box’ that happens to be inside a dildo. It also includes – more conventionally – a necklace and an amplifier for playing music that reminds you of the deceased. There’s also a scent diffuser and a gold-plated urn.

The glass urn allows you to place your loved one’s ashes inside — 21 grams of ashes, to be precise. It just so happens that 21 grams is popularly (and erroneously) thought of as the weight of the soul when it leaves the body on death, according to experiments performed by a doctor at the beginning of the 20th century.

Sturkenboom says he dreamed up the sex toy after noticing that an old woman that he assists with her groceries, who kept an urn containing the remains of her late husband. He felt that did not reflect the way she spoke so lovingly about him.

In that same period I read an article about widows, taboos and sex and intimacy and then I thought to myself, ‘can I combine these themes and make an object that is about love and missing and intimacy?’

Read related article: Ashes in a Dildo

Montreal’s Divers/Cité Festival On Edge Of Bankruptcy

Divers/Cité

Founded in 1994, Divers/Cité was responsible for the organization of the popular “Divers/Cité Festival”, a celebration of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transsexual and transvestite pride.

As of March 3rd, 2015, it sought protection from creditors, thus ending all it’s activities. According to documents from the Office of the Superintendent of Bankruptcy Canada, total debt amounted to nearly $ 214,500. A third of the debt consists of salaries ($ 71,500) while the rest is divided between 23 other creditors.

Usually held in the Village, the festival was moved to the Old Port of Montreal in the summer of 2012, a blow by Suzanne Girard, co-founder and CEO of the organization.

“Since we were on the dock of the Old Port, we ate all our financial reserves”, she had said in the” Fugues magazine. “The fact that it is a free outdoor event, it was never profitable.”

For an in-depth article:

The Day Divers/Cité Died

Music Video of the Day: Girls Chase Boys

I’m really liking this music vid by Ingrid Michaelson, done as a modernized homage to Robert Plant’s “Simply Irresistible” — so much lovely guyliner and gender-switching to enjoy!